Tuesday, December 8, 2009

Realization

Last night, I woke up in the middle of sleep wheezing heavily. Each breath that I took in was laborious and required every ounce of effort I had left in me. Sleep abandoned me as I lay there huffing and puffing the night away.

In the quiet of the night, I listened to my lungs clunk like an old engine being forced to start and sputter. The lack of oxygen in my brain made it even more muddled than usual. Silly thoughts were running (tumbling, more like) in my head and I was wondering what would happen in the morning if my lungs decided to collapse right then.

There wouldn't be any chance to say goodbye to everyone I want to say goodbye to. I guess I can do that in the afterlife, if there's such a thing. I thought about my stuff, what would happen to them. And then I thought about my life and what I've done with it; and I realize that there's not much to miss.

My breathing slowly returned to near normal after I took medicine, tiredness eventually took over and I drifted to a restless slumber.

1 comment:

Bim said...

:( This entry made me sad. :(